All is full of Love~

I felt weird today.
I don't know what it was. It felt like I was sick, but I actually wasn't...?
I also had a sudden urge to just take off anything that I've applied onto myself. Took off all my jewellery, all my makeup, nailpolish, bra, shoes, everything.
I looked at myself in the mirror... nothing covering up the real me.
I don't know what my reaction was, but I just remember thinking "wow..I look really tired."
My skin was pale, as it always is.
My hair hung flat against my head, my eyes looked out at me in a lazy way, almost as if it was another person's eyes, just another day observing what I do.
My collar bone seemed to almost belong to a starving person, so prominent.
My breasts...meh, they'll never change.
As I looked lower down, I noticed that I liked the way my waist kind of curved in. Ohay figure I'd never noticed before! XD
My stomach... ofcourse I'm sure we'd all like a flatter stomach, but whatever.
May as well deal with what you've got.
Mine's got kind of a..dip? Between my ribs and my bellybutton.
I don't know if that's supposed to be there but yeah xD
As I looked further down to my legs, I remember compliments I got from people saying my legs had a nice shape.
I looked at my calves and noticed the slight way they curved from my knee, to my ankle. It was nice =)
Then I looked at my body as a whole and realised... I've spent way too much time trying to alter this.
Too much time stressing, wishing my boobs were bigger, wishing my stomach was flatter, that my thighs weren't as wobbly hahahaha ;P
But I realise now that... I'm happy with myself.
With my body.
Overweight people really shouldn't be any less confident than skinny people, unless they're one of those people who spend seven years of their life lying in bed because they're too fat to get up -__-
Because I think most of us should be so grateful that we haven't turned out with massive tumors on our faces, obscuring our vision and our ability to speak.
A lot of us were lucky to be born without physical disabilities, and yet we stress that our skin is oily? That our love-handles are showing?
Sure, it's good to exercise and have a healthy diet, keeping our body in shape, but is it really worth worrying about so much that our self-esteem is at rock bottom?
No.
No it isn't.
People have gone through so much to change how they look.
Eating disorders, over-exercising, surgery, EVERYTHING to change who we are.
Screw you magazines and media for encouraging us to think we're ugly.
You try to change your ways now by including exercise reigimes we can do in the health section, but what about the pictures of pretty much anno girls wearing the equivelant to a handkerchief?
And LOOK SO GOOD?
I doubt you'll be changing the thoughts of self-hatred experienced by those who can't pull off that look =='
Screw you Coco Chanel for being the first to make people believe that tanning was a good thing, possibly killing thousands of people thanks to skin cancer.
And just screw anybody that makes someone feel like shit about themselves.
I don't know what conclusion I've drawn, but I know that I won't be pressured into an eating disorder to look good.
I want to be me, and just flaunt what I've got XD I don't completely love myself, and I doubt I ever will, but I know that I'll be glad that I was left with this body and not something far worse o__o


You'll be given love
You'll be taken care of
You'll be given love
You have to trust it

Maybe not from the sources
You have poured yours
Maybe not from the directions
You are staring at

Twist your head around
It's all around you
All is full of love
All around you

All is full of love
You just ain't receiving
All is full of love
Your phone is off the hook
All is full of love
Your doors are all shut
All is full of love!

All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love
All is full of love

[All Is Full Of Love, by Bjork]

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